I do not really know what I am feeling right now, once this morning I felt fine just fine but three days before that I felt strange like I had lost something... no like I will loose something but I do not know what it is or when I will loose it...

I feel sad... no not sad... empty no not that either I feel everything the good and the bad and there all mixing into the color black...no brown... no white... this is nothing important just writing releasing something...
I feel like I am fighting... fighting for something I Thought I won already, but my ambition has been slacking? no I do not think so but the results are proveing me different... Maybe I am just observing things to hard... to much... to close... I wish it would all go away... I wish I could type faster then my already 80 per minute i wish I could but I can't i feel as though I have reaqched my limit but I do not want it to be my Limit Please do NOT let this be my limit...

I do not like knowing that I have limits, thats i am something like a human, I wish I was something more so I could fight for the one I love better more efficiently... more carefully... What I would give to think faster... to love better...

I am ranting i am finding it easier to smile to... cry but I refuse to do so unless the one I asm fighting for is here...

But its... Better...

To all those who have ever thought of telling a secret, your wrong...
Kepp those to yourself and only to yourself, they are like a gem without any protection, and if your a human, you should know that these gems and rare and are hardly give out, keep them for yourself anf no one else. But if you are to recieve a gem from another, you now must share, but only between the two of you,
and to those who do share, becareful who you give this precious gem.

At the risk of sounding like the emotional freak I am what is the true meaning and defining of love? I'm not asking for advice about what to do in a relationship, but how do you determine a friendship from a relationship, true love from, lust and looks? when does likeing someone turn into a crush and then into almost in "love" and then to the point where you feel that telling that person could ruin you, by thier denial or refusal of your confession of feelings, but there is still some small glimmer of hope deep within you that drives you mad bangging on the bars of your teeth to say the words that so many like to speak but never have full meaning to them.
.
.
.
I Love You.
.
.
.
What does such a saying mean?
Does love and true love really have a difference?
Does love come from the desire to be with that person for the rest of your life?
Or does it come from the desire that the world has brought the youth of the world to want and that is the partnership of another person?
Do youth love because they find it or do they find "love" because they feel the need that it is necessary?

i apologize for such a long thought process, please you do not have to answe any questions if you do not feel the need or want... i was just writing down thoughts with keys, thanks for listening.

Ok i understand that i have been asking for a lot of help latley and to be honnest i don't why anyway i need ideas for a romantic, twisted plot that involves sesshomaru and rin, if you do not like these characters i understand you don;t have to help me then. anyway if you don't care, wel then you don't care but, i'm just looking for a couple of ideas to toss around thanks to all.


thanx to evryone of my friends!!!!!

ok so when your grades are down what do you do? i have tried everything! turning int my work on time going after school for help, (i know i'm not slow you can ask my friend docs and parents) but now matter what i do even extra credit does not seem to help!
anybody have any ideas that may just help me pass this year, the last thing i want to do is repeat freshmen year at my school.
if any at all come thank you so so much again.
All my friends here on this website have kept me going and for that i thank you all!